


Amethyst

by TheSleepyNinja15



Category: Code Geass
Genre: Angst, Drama, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-19
Updated: 2018-04-19
Packaged: 2019-04-25 00:17:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,280
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14366832
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheSleepyNinja15/pseuds/TheSleepyNinja15
Summary: C.C. is going to have one of the most important events in her life and she wants to share it to someone from her past. This is a companion story of 'Red' told in C.C.'s perspective. It is recommended to read 'Red' first for full understanding. Inspired by EXO's song 'Been Through'. AU, Oneshot.





	Amethyst

"C.C., we're going to start transferring the paintings to the gallery. Is everything prepared?"

C.C., a young woman 23-years of age, puts down the paint brush she's been using for two hours, makes a quick once-over of the project she's currently working on before going to the next room where her bestfriend is so busy sorting out her other outputs.

Leaning against the doorframe, she watches the red head carefully and gently put a white cloth over a painting. A small smile emerges on her lips. "I'm still working on the last one, but aside from that, everything's ready to go."

With this, her friend turns around and blinks at her. "Another one? But the exhibit is only four days away. Are you sure about this?" she asks worriedly.

"I'm already at the finishing touches anyway, no need to worry, Kallen. Is the truck ready? I'd like to come with you and see the other artists," she waves off.

"Yeah. Gino's going to drive us there."

"Well, then. I'll just go change. See you later."

* * *

 

When was the last time she felt this kind of intense nervousness and excitement? It's still four days to go before the actual event but her anxiety has been bugging her for weeks now. Just thinking about what could go wrong during the event makes her want to run to the nearest restroom and vomit. This is one of the most important moments in her life. In this event, not only her works are being put out there, but also the works of other artists who put their trust on her to make their dreams come true. She tries to remember what Dr. Lloyd told her during those therapy sessions.  _Think of an event that made you feel the same emotions but that ended positively._

An event that made her feel the same, huh?

_She was 18 then. He was 20. She was the freshman art school student, he was the last minute-call pianist. She was there as part of the art students' painting exhibit, he was there to replace a friend who got the flu the night before. She wasn't supposed to meet him._

_But she did._

_"Miss, are you okay?" he had asked then, his first words to her._

_Looking up from where she was cradling her head in her hands, his worried purple eyes were the first ones that greeted her and she was struck at how pretty and elegant that shade of purple was. Amethyst, she thought. That's right, amethyst was the fitting term. An elegant word for those elegant eyes._

_"I'm fine. Just nerves from this whole thing," she replied._

_"Well, looks like I'm not alone." The man took out his hand from his pocket and held it infront of her. "I'm Lelouch."_

_Taking his hand, she said, "C.C."_

_Lelouch raised his eyebrow, curious._   _"Just initials?"_

_"Well, you need to earn my trust first before I let you know my name," she replied._

_After a brief handshake, the man, Lelouch, stood beside her and leaned against the wall. "Good hiding place, by the way. If not for your hair, I wouldn't find it. Mind if I join you?"_

_She shook her head while consciously touching her hair. She's been used to the attention her odd green hair gets whenever she's outside. It's not everyday that you'll find someone with a natural green hair anyway. At least it was not neon green. She shivered at that thought._

_"So I take it you're a student?"_

_She nodded. "Yes. I'm actually part of the exhibit. And you?"_

_A helpless chuckle came from him. "I'm the last minute-call pianist. My friend who was originally invited here caught a flu last night."_

_"So you're not supposed to be here," she stated matter-of-factly._

_"No, I am not. I'm supposed to be at home having dinner with my sister tonight," he said, not unkindly. He sighed. "I'm not yet even sure what I would play today. I'm not even a professional, I might forget some notes"_

_He had a kind voice, she decided. Deep, but gentle and kind._

_She liked that._

_"Well, if it makes you feel better, I've been at the verge of throwing up for the past week. This is the first exhibit I participated that is being attended by professional critics. Thinking about it kept me up last night."_

_"How pitiful beings we are right now." A comfortable silence descended upon them, contended on watching strangers of different motivation, of different origins be united by the idea of fulfilling their dreams. C.C., now left on her thoughts again, noticed how her nervousness had subsided and her headache was gone, replaced by a strange giddy feeling. A small sigh of relief escaped from her. She liked this better._

_"But you know what?" he said suddenly. "Despite the late notice, despite the lack of time to practice, I still accepted the invitation thinking how, somehow, this is still some kind of opportunity." His voice turning wistful, he continued, "Maybe, someone out there will notice my skills and give me a chance to prove them. I believe me being here has a reason. I just need to find what that reason is." He turned to her. "I'm boring you."_

_She shook her head. "No. I think you're right, and that actually made me feel better so thank you," she said. "It makes me think, how sometimes, the best moments came from the most unexpected events."_

_"Well, glad to be of service, milady." Something caught his eyes in the crowd. When she followed his line of sight, she found a man waving at them. "Well, that's my cue. It's time for me to perform. Will you watch it?" Strangely, his voice turned wary all of a sudden._

_She smiled encouragingly at him. "I will."_

_She expected him to leave and go to the man so when he stepped towards her, grabbed her hand and squeezed it, she was nothing but surprised._ _She stared at his amethyst eyes thinking of the ways how she could perfectly replicate the shade, how that one color would be the theme of her next collection and of the next and the next until she achieved the same shade._

_"C.C.," he started quietly. "Is it wrong of me to thank my friend for being sick today? Because I think I know one of the reasons why I'm here."_

_A deep blush started to warm her cheeks, words suddenly left her with his sudden declaration so she just settled on slowly shaking her head._

_He exhaled. "I'm glad. Well, see you later."_

It's not until a month after that they saw each other again in an accidental meeting in a pizzeria. C.C. smiled at the memory. She's feeling better now.

* * *

 

Tuesday night, she wakes up gasping from a terrible nightmare, one she cannot remember but the fear and despair it brought still linger in her bones making her shiver. She reaches for someone beside her, but there is no one but air. Blindly, she reaches for her phone, browses her playlist until she finally finds the music that will lull her to a peaceful sleep.

_"What's the title of that?" she had asked him after listening to the new piece he just finished that morning._

_"I haven't thought of anything actually. But, what do you think?"_

Beautiful. Breathtaking. Ethereal.

_Tapping her finger on her lips, she thought of the right words to respond to him. He had told her before that he didn't want her to sugarcoat him with praises, instead he wanted her to be brutally honest with her opinions and tell him what's on her mind. Lelouch was a good listener, but he's also a pro in taking criticisms._

_"Hmmm, let's see. It gave me a dreamlike atmosphere, almost otherworldly. Like… Like the sound of crickets during a night of full moon. Or… like that feeling when you're travelling at night and your passing by streetlights. Nostalgic, peaceful, dreamy. But..."_

_"But?"_

_"Well, it also makes me want to fall asleep," she added gently. She held his hand and swayed it between them. She loved to touch his slender hands, to feel the callous on their tips from practices. She loved to hold a masterpiece in her hands._

_That night, when she stumbled upon the music sheet he was working in the morning, she read the title with a smile on her face._

_'Lullaby for Cecil'_

And tonight, it accompanies her to sleep.

* * *

 

She has been sitting in her car for the past 30 minutes, contemplating on the fortune of a piece of paper lying on the dashboard. The Guest List is complete. Everyone who should be invited was sent an invitation. From her family, former mentors and professors, her classmates, her colleagues in the industry, to the family of the aspiring participants, everyone has been sent an invitation a month ago. So why is she here, a day before the exhibit, sitting inside her car for 30 minutes infront of a nondescript building with an invitation waiting to be given to a guest?

But he is not just some other guest. He is  _The Guest._

He is the guest that never left her mind (and her heart) after they separated ways. He is the guest that has his face occupying various canvasses stocked in a room because she's afraid that one day, one day, she would forget how to draw the contour of his nose, the arch of his brows, the perfect shade of his eyes. He is the guest that many invitations were dedicated to but left unsent because she's afraid that he wouldn't come. How it would break her again if he didn't come. And he is the guest that despite uninvited, keeps on invading her mind for the past two years.

Because she had long forgiven the guest. She had forgiven Lelouch for what he had done.

It took some time and a serious trip to the hospital before she finally realized what he meant for what he did. That she let her ambition and selfishness destroy the one thing that is most precious to them. That the one who was being selfish was her and not him. Him who was always there during her darkest days when she felt that what she was doing wasn't worth it. Him who woke up in the middle of how many nights just to keep her company in strolls eventhough he had an early practice the next day.

Him who always reminded her that she creates miracles.

Him who always told her that she was his miracle.

She had forgiven him, but she hasn't forgiven herself.

So she settled on watching from the sidelines as his dreams come true. She's always the first one to leave after he gave the final note of the last music in his conciertos not wanting to distract him with her presence. She cried when he heard the news that he scored his first solo world tour. She cried harder when he won the prestigious music award he had been dreaming of. And when he played 'Lullaby for Cecil' in that award show, she broke down infront of the TV.

C.C. shakes her head. The invitation won't walk on its own. She's here now might as well complete the mission. Stepping out of her car, she goes to the lobby to ask for the studio where he is working when a memory stops her on her tracks.

What if he is with a girl right now? What if he is with his girlfriend right now? The face of a woman with ginger hair flashes on her mind. It happened more than a year ago, when she was ready to talk to him again, and fortunately one of the rare times their schedules let them stay in one city, when she saw him exiting a café with a girl clinging on his arm.

She remembers the shock she felt first, then the panic of them seeing her, so she hid behind the nearest plant ornament in the park. She was just on her way back to the hotel from shopping when she spotted them.

_"Where are we going next, Lulu?" she heard a high pitched voice asked._

_Lulu? She snorted at the nickname._

_"Well, it's your day, so wherever you want to go, we will go, Shirley."_

_She almost dropped to the ground right then and there upon hearing his voice. His deep but gentle and kind voice that she had loved so much._

_"Really! Oh my God, I'm so lucky to have you as my boyfriend!"_

_And she heard some sounds that she's sure were kissing sounds._

_She left and never looked back._

_I'll just leave it to the lobby then_ , she decided. After telling the receptionist his name, she leaves the building contemplating whether she made the right decision or not.

* * *

 

But he didn't come.

Of course, he wouldn't come. Why would he?

After everything that happened during that fateful night, their relationship fell apart. They didn't break up that same night. No, they couldn't. Their love for each other was still strong, still kept them together, but with the mistrust and betrayal that budded between the grounds they were walking, they slowly grew apart from each other. They tried to save their relationship for a couple of months. They tried to pretend that that night was just something they could easily came out from. They thought they came out unscathed. But when two people were just staying together out of desperation and not of love, everything would eventually fall apart.

She accompanies people around the gallery, walking them through every piece, feeling proud of the works of these emerging artists who've dedicated all their hardwork and time for this special event. She had been them once, someone who had aspired for the world to see her creation. She was young, strong-willed but easily overwhelmed with everything around her but now…

But now, she has found her footing. Now, she can see her surroundings in focus. Now, she's ready to reach out.

But he didn't come.

The theme of her collection is the color 'red'. Every piece was created through combinations of various shades, from rose, to cherry, to wine, to imperial, to scarlet, to crimson. From the softest tone depicting beauty and tenderness to the deepest tone depicting carnage and ferocity. But why the color 'red' exactly? It's not even her favourite color, pink is. She's been fascinated by it for a very long time but that's not the reason why she chose it as her prevailing theme. Well, if she's going to be honest with herself, it's because one moment has been visiting her mind lately.

_"You, Lelouch Lamperouge, are my Red," she had said._

_Her heart was filled with butterflies and pride when an awestruck smile appeared in his face. "C.C… C.C…" he uttered._

_"Yes, Lelouch?" she asked teasingly._

_He buried his face in her hair and she could feel how fast his heart was beating. "Dammit C.C., You never fail to amaze me."_

_"I think it's time for you to say something equally cheesy."_

_A soft chuckle vibrated from his chest sending quivers on her skin. "Well, then. C.C…" he looked at her intently, amethyst eyes filled with adoration. "Cecilia, you are my miracle."_

Perhaps, that's the reason she chose red. That color holds so much memories and emotions she treasures the most. Perhaps, that's the reason she chose red. She wanted to reach out to her Red.

But he didn't come.

"C.C., they're calling your name."

C.C. blinks at Kallen and realizes that the host has been saying her name for her to deliver her message. Taking a deep breath, she makes her way toward the stage.

The lights in the room dimmed, wrapping the audience in a blanket of darkness giving her the illusion of solitude. She starts off with introducing the theme of the exhibit and giving recognition to the participants. Then sharing some of her own experiences when she was just new to the industry.

It was when she was thanking everyone who had helped the event be possible that she caught a glimpse of a pair of amethyst eyes. Those amethyst eyes that shine so bright like the biggest star in the night sky. Those amethyst eyes that she knew too well. They were the first ones she saw when they first met each other, now they are also the ones she finds upon seeing him again.

In an art exhibit. In the dark corner of the room.

But this time, she is 23 and he is 25. This time, she is an established painter and he is an award-winning pianist. This time, he was invited to the event and is supposed to be here.

And he came, just like five years ago.

She stumbles over her words, too surprised with his presence. The next thing she knew, she was spewing names out of her mouth from a memorized list prepared days ago. She is truly grateful for them, really truly grateful but… but he's here.

Her message ended abruptly and she's going down the stage without taking her eyes off him and he's turning around,  _why is he turning around? The event hasn't ended, where is he going?_  And people are stepping on her way, congratulating her,  _job well done! Thank you for giving this opportunity to my son, your works are so amazing!_  And she tells them,  _thank you thank you, I'm glad to help_  while willing him to stay in his place, her mind chanting,  _wait wait wait, please stay_. She just wanted to talk to him, she doesn't care if he already has someone in his life, she just needed to talk to him.

And say 'Thank you".

Thank you for being a part of her life. Thank you for being always there for her during her highest and lowest. Thank you for being her muse that kept her going when inspiration avoided her. Thank you for being the star that lighted up her night when everything is dark. Thank you, because without him, she won't be there. Thank you thank you thank you for loving her.

And most of all, she wants to let him know that he was forgiven, that she understands now what he did, and that he didn't do anything wrong.

And then maybe,  _maybe_ , they could both let go.

She finally reaches him and all she can say to prevent him from going is, "Leaving already without saying 'Hi'? I expected more from you, Lelouch."

And he stops, visibly takes in a deep breath, then turns to her.

And finally,  _finally_ , those amethyst eyes are looking at her.

"C.C… It's nice to see you, C.C."

Hearing his familiar voice once again after years brings an onslaught of emotions to her that her eyes start to leak uncontrollably.

"C.C. are you okay?" he asks worriedly just like what he did when they first met.

She nods, trying to produce some words while wiping her eyes. "I'm okay, I'm okay. I'm just… I'm just…"

Suddenly, strong arms wrap around her enclosing her to a comforting embrace. She looks up and is surprised to see that his eyes are also shining with unshed tears. He gazes down at her with such wonder and understanding and say, "I know. I know."

Then he buries his face on her neck. And they stay like that in a dark corner of the room, with only the two of them as each other's company just like all those years ago.


End file.
